simplifying my life: keeping up
i am letting go.
i am letting go of trying to keep up. letting go of my feelings and thoughts of "entitlement".
we made this mistake when we were newlyweds. why did we think we had to have the newest home with granite counters, crown molding, new cars and the best decor around?
i thought i started to let go of this when i had kids but nope.
i just made sure they had the best clothes, sweetest hair bows and the trendiest toys around. ohh and their rooms had to be the best decorated. and don't even get me started on birthday parties and vacation planning.
then my dad got sick.
i began to think this is all meaningless.
what if i got sick?
everything i worked to achieve for my family and myself would be meaningless.
"i denied myself nothing my eyes desire;
i refused my heart no pleasure.
my heart took delight in all my work,
and this was reward for all my labor.
yet when i surveyed all that my hands had done
and what i had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless,
a chasing after the wind;
nothing was gained under the sun."
where did this sense of entitlement come from? i was not raised that way. getting a coke at mcdonalds was a treat. and it was a big deal if we got to rent a movie at blockbuster...remember those days. they were not that long ago.
we have been blessed with a full time jobs as a RN and my husband a high school teacher. with that comes pressure. okay maybe not pressure from peers but pressure in the sense of "keeping up with the jones" .... (it is not my intention to offend anyone with this post).
most of us are moms and full time nurses. with that comes huge benefits. we can usually afford to go on elaborate vacations (and I'm talking disneyland....it is so pricey theses days!), live in the suburbs with amazing homes, have nice new cars of all shapes and sizes and can afford pretty trendy cloths and dine out weekly with family and friends.
none of this is bad, but when did i start letting what others around me were achieving dictate how i spent my money, treated my family and most of all honored my God?
so i have had enough.
-we are trading in our 2200sq home for something almost half the size.
-my kids can share a room. just 2 generations ago it was the norm.
-we don't need a pool, a blow up one is fine.
-we rarely need to have new clothes.... plus vintage is in.
-i have young children....we sooo do not need brand new furniture.
and above all we need to learn how to give.
and i mean give, until it hurts.
give until it impinges on our standard of living.
we don't need it all.